I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
we made out on top of his cat.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize