I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
