Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
