Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
