it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
