I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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