how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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