I love watching others lives come down to our level.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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