alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
