i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
