What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
