Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
