walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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