She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
So many bounce houses so little time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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