"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Randomize
