try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
