marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
