Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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