that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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