Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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