It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
