My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Let's paint friendship bongs
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
