the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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