Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
