glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
