I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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