get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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