Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
