i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
