Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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