Don't you send me to vm
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Sorry about my life...
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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