I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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