at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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