What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
