He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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