btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
