Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
