also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Is Oprah even human
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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