I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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