can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
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He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
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The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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