I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
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