Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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