I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
