I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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