I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
