you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
