We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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