We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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