just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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