You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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