Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing

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(702): i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing http://tfl.nu/wbpb

Replies (6) Good night (981) Bad night (1941)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

i'm saving my butt for my wedding night

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(609): i'm saving my butt for my wedding night http://tfl.nu/fqx0

Replies (53) Good night (4401) Bad night (984)
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(904): View more from Florida

There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?

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(904): There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it? http://tfl.nu/a6bf

Replies (92) Good night (2591) Bad night (3321)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion

(202): View more from Washington, DC

He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction

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(202): Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion (202): He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction http://tfl.nu/lcwv

Replies (60) Good night (801) Bad night (5326)
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(240): View more from Maryland

Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?

(732): View more from New Jersey

like it was yesterday

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(240): Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra? (732): like it was yesterday http://tfl.nu/1org

Replies (20) Good night (11809) Bad night (1297)
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(816): View more from Missouri

If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.

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(816): If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing. http://tfl.nu/vitq

Replies (3) Good night (1264) Bad night (1238)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog

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(973): i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog http://tfl.nu/1yan

Replies (12) Good night (968) Bad night (2773)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.

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(203): you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class (1-203): why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday. http://tfl.nu/0z2t

Replies (4) Good night (3689) Bad night (634)
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(509): View more from Washington

We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler

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(509): We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler http://tfl.nu/7vbk

Replies (12) Good night (1461) Bad night (607)
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(619): View more from California

The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it

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(619): The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it http://tfl.nu/3uov

Replies (8) Good night (1270) Bad night (416)
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(616): View more from Michigan

Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.

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(616): Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS. http://tfl.nu/6mor

Replies (3) Good night (269) Bad night (733)
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(312): View more from Illinois

I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.

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(312): I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again. http://tfl.nu/hmft

Replies (0) Good night (633) Bad night (317)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...

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(617): I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song... http://tfl.nu/aol8

Replies (3) Good night (614) Bad night (387)
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(510): View more from California

Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"

(510): View more from California

How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??

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(510): Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion" (510): How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done?? http://tfl.nu/izmz

Replies (5) Good night (646) Bad night (289)
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(519): View more from Ontario

but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it

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(519): but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it http://tfl.nu/i5c8

Replies (0) Good night (622) Bad night (272)

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